A recent conversation in the car, after picking up Baby Duck and Demon Duck from their respective schools:
Demon Duck: Oh, Mum – I got my maths test back today. I got 100% again.
Baby Duck: Well, try harder next time. You’re a disgrace to the family name!
I’m not sure what the Carnivore would be prouder of: that his daughter inherited his maths ability, or that his son got his warped sense of humour!